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In Good Health and Bad

Health is a shit of a thing. A bastard that sticks around in good times, and then deserts you when things turn. Cold weather - it says, See ya later! Snotty kids sneezing and spitting to their hearts content in your vicinity, and Health retreats, Bye-bye. Oh, and don't even consider playing a competitive game of sport after a period of inactivity, Health will unashamedly yell as it slams the door, See ya Loser!


And, what about its bloody cousin Mental Health? It just turns its nose up at everything. A colleague being a total arse at work - Mental Health seems to have taken Long Service Leave without logging it with its boss. A relationship breakdown - Mental Health is not only MIA, but like a bad spy movie, it seems to have signed up to work for the other side.


I just don't get it. I mean, I have given my all to them both over the years. Short of a fecal transplant I'm up for anything that gives Health and Mental Health a boost (there is NO way I am putting someone else's poop in my Colon!). My lifestyle choices have been mostly good - I do love a bit of choccy and wine (not together) but that's normal, isn't it? And I can moderate. I used to go for a run habitually on a Saturday at 4pm, knowing I would be partaking in social drinking that evening. Now, tell me that's not being kind to Health??? And then I'd get up the next day at the crack of dawn and work in the garden all day. Yes - I was committed!


I've been on Retreats too. The Qigong weekend in the Yarra Valley last year was sensational. Like a love letter penned admiringly for Mental Health. And I've been a repeat customer to Yoga in the blue mountains. Again, a good time was had by all - Health and Mental Health both thanked me for it! Although, thinking back now, that Thai masseuse was as dubious as they come - who instructs a woman wearing only underwear to flex her legs behind her ears while they push down from above? I mean, Mental Health was slightly perplexed by this little detour from the bliss of the rest of the weekend...


The other thing I'm growing to realise is the spawn of my Mental Health, my children's MH if you like, seems to be more tenuous than mine. And, when I think about that, I can tell you that my mother's MH was neither here nor there. She just got on with life. So, if judging by my offspring and their fractured relationship with their MH, it seems obvious, MH seems to be weakening over the generations. It's not what it used to be for the human population. What are we to do?


My son has admitted himself to a private mental health ward to try and focus on his MH. I'm really proud of him because young men don't have the same outlets that women do, to 'talk things out'. Not that this is the solution to all things MH. But, I'm sure it helps to have friends to bounce things off. There is so much shame attached to MH. Maybe they can do some sort of shameadectomy (similar to an appendectomy) while he's in there...I mean, appendixes are useless aren't they, and so is that shit of an emotion Shame.


I've told myself that peak-condition me has to be kind to myself and not expect the same relationship I had with Health and MH now as I did thirty years ago. They've changed and I've changed. We want different things, but we can still be friends...can't we?




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